Fear of failure, fear of uncertainty, fear of judgement, fear of disappointment… The list can go on and on.
This is very common to feel this way and also very challenging to overcome. A more destructive, self-sustaining form of fear happens when we refuse to admit to ourselves we are having fear, and because of this people tend to play life too safe.
What happens when you play life too safe?
You miss tremendous opportunities, and you find yourself asking “What If?”
The thing is, 'Failure' is inevitable in life. If we do not fail, we do not learn, and without learning we are not growing.
Failure needs to be treated as feedback. It is alright if you fail as long as you know what happened and what can be done to improve for next time. One of the keys to creating extraordinary results in life is to learn and keep improving from the outcomes we get.
A great way to get more comfortable with failing and learning quickly from it, is to try something new and do something different more frequently. Practicing in low-stakes situations so our minds can feel more comfortable taking risks. Just try taking a small step out of your comfort zone, you never know, it could open up a new opportunity; you could also find a new talent hidden within.
As for Fear, most of the time it begins in the middle stages of Goal Setting.
We set a goal, we get excited, we set out on a plan and begin to work towards the plan. But what happens next? Reality sets in... we get distracted, our priorities change; we let the opinions of others affect us. And because of this we begin to doubt ourselves, “Is it worth the risk?” “Maybe I can’t do it after all.” Usually during this time the big fear smacks us in the face and so our goal and vision slowly fizzles away, and we go back to playing life safe.
What if we spent just as much time on Fear Setting as we did on Goal Setting?
Sounds like a strange concept, doesn’t it?
Perhaps you're even wondering, what even is 'Fear Setting'
Fear Setting is a strategy for thriving in high stress environments. It’s a way to visualize all the bad things that could happen to you, so you become less afraid of taking action.
So pretty much we want to chase the fear downinstead of it tackling us down. If we define the fear first we can be more prepared and ready to overcome it!
Goal Setting is absolutely necessary and important, but what might be just as important is Fear Setting. If we can work on both it will stop us from having this over optimistic mindset that everything is going to work out, and instead prepare ourselves what lies ahead.
So here is an exercise you can do right now to tackle on your fear.
Yes today.. Yes right now! What better way to overcome your fear?
FEAR SETTING
(Answer each question as detailed as possible)
Fear: (state your fear)
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Worst: (what is the worst possible outcome)
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Likely: (What is a more reasonable and realistic outcome)
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Upside: (What is the best outcome you could gain)
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Decision: (What have you decided to do)
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Outcome: (What was the result)
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As you look at fear setting as an exercise, it gives you multiple ways of coping with the downside and realizing that many of the bad outcomes that you imagined to happen, are not as bad as you think they may be.
It is also a great tool to use alongside goal setting; it balances itself out so you don’t have this over optimistic mindset that everything is going to work out then getting slapped by reality.
Once you do this a few times and you recognize these smaller issues and fears that do arise, you can start to mentally process the decision in only just a few minutes. Most of the time the downside is relatively limited.
Hope you Liked this article, if you have any feedback or questions please place below in the comments section.
If you would like a more in depth view of 'Facing Your Fear - Fear Setting', check out my New eBook that can be downloaded from Amazon Kindle https://bit.ly/RedefineYourselfebook
Elizabeth,